Originally posted: May 3, 2006
Bloggers across the nation are depressed and lonely because of a lack of interest in their personal lives. While they were under the impression that most people cared that they were having boy problems, or that their cat did the funniest thing today, it turns out that no one really does. Oddly enough people still seem to care who's going out with Jennifer Lopez (not me or I would've looked it up and told you in these parentheses).
One blogger who must remain nameless because she's 15 said, "I don't understand it! I almost went all the way with Jeremy the other day, like we were rounding third and then I was just like no I can't do this and he was like come on baby and I was like I just can't but I'll help you finish if you want so then I helped him finish with my hand, and I only got five hits on my blog article about it. I thought that kind of sexy stuff made headlines. I don't think its that people don't care....they just don't know, so that's why I'm advertising my intimate sexual experiences in as many places as I can."
She later told me she was going to write in her blog all about how she got interviewed today. I can't wait!
In a piece of related news 500 underage girls were sexually assaulted today by people they met on myspace. The parents of these children banded together to complain about the popular website. The Parents Against Pedophiles (PAP) smear campaign began early last night, where they protested outside official myspace headquarters. They say they will be making demands that websites keep a strict standard of decency and protection for their use and any site that fails these PAP tests will be considered a cancer on society.
The timer for my cookies just went off. See you next time.
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